So, love sucks yet again.
I told this guy that I liked him, and of course, I was rejected. However, the good news still remains. We are still friends, and there is no awkwardness. But I can't get over it. I still like him even though I should just move on, you know?
It's really weird, I was writing all this dark poetry before about how loved hurt so much without him. But the pain before is nothing to what it is right now.
The pain of loving someone, and thinking to yourself, Wow, I am never going to be able to really be happy again without him.
I probably will be happy without him, and I am going to have to, but the feeling in your heart when that thought comes into your mind is like igniting a piece of paper. It burns, and burns, until you are nothing.
The ash that remains blows with the wind, and again, you are left with nothing except the broken shards of your heart.
So, when you think your life sucks, fall in love I garentee it will take your mind off of things for a bit.
Is there something wrong with me? Am I not pretty enough, not cool enough, not sane enough? Because all of this rejection makes me want to just give up. I don't know what to do anymore. Because every time I fall in love, I can't breath, see, feel anything when I think that I will be alone, without them by my side.
Should I give up? Should I forget about love even though it is a part of my very being?
I can't live without it. It's the only thing that as kept me alive, wanting to see that love that will make me happy...truly happy again.
I wish it could have been him. I wish he could have seen me the way I see him.
Because when I see him, I see only light. I see only him.
He can make me forget the other pain, he could make me feel real inside. But alas, nothing. Just friends. His poem for English...It began with

He watched as she gracefully glided into the room
His heart ached as he remembered those two painful words
JUST FRIENDS the phrase came crashing down on his heart with a boom

If this was written as a girl instead of a guy, then I can swear to you I would be the writer.